Thursday, July 24, 2008

Marriage Help

Do you remember the wedding vow you made to your partner when the day you got married?

I vivdly remember there's something like:

1) Till-Death-Do-Us-Part
2) For Better or For Worse

I don't know how many people actually stay put to their unhappy marriage just becos of this vow or for the kids.

Divorce rates are rising & birth rates are depreciating in Singapore. :(

In future, we will see lesser & lesser cute, adorable babies on the streets. Women nowadays learn to be smarter & refuse to give birth cos...

Giving birth = Commiting slow suicide.

Baby Raeann is slowly killing but also entertaining me with all her movements, words & laughter.

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Her everyday favourite past time - messing with plastic bags.

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Potato chips face.

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Sweetie pie.

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My favourite wink & smile. Her new toy - Winnie The Pooh Car from her papa.

ZY came to visit her yesterday as he is going off to KL today till Saturday. I was at home with her cos she refused to wake up in the morning for me to go prepare myself. She slept for a straight 12 hours from 9pm - 9am. She must be very tired so i also can't bear to disturb her sweet dreams.

We went out for dinner together as a little family, for little Raeann. But we didn't talk much cos somehow, there's a gap between us already. I can see Raeann is very happy cos it's been quite some time she went out together with her daddy & mummy.

And once again, i'm confused.

I went to do a research on 'Marriage Counselling'; how to salvage a problems marriage. I wanted so much to know, whether the biggest problem lies with who that makes this marriage turn out like that. I admit i have faults in dealing it.

I wasn't as patience as before after pregnant & i'll get irritated by even a single bit of issue. I can't help it, it's the hormones changes in me.

This article is quite ... helpful in some ways!

Life has roadblocks and will always be full of obstacles, threatening the stability of married life. It is how you and your partner are able to handle these disruptions that determine the sustainability of your life together.

Sometimes problems can be easily overcome. Some times they need work. And other times they feel completely insurmountable. The good news is that there is a lot of marriage help available for couples having problems with their marriage relationships.

Marriage and family counseling is one option for an unhappy marriage. But sometimes it can just take one partner being prepared to change that can make the difference (and because you're reading this I'm guessing that person is you!). It isn't defeat to accept that YOU are the one that needs to change to make your relationship into what YOU want it to be. And often enough a change in one person will bring about a change in your partner even without your asking them to do anything differently simply because you've changed and the old games can't be played the same way anymore.

The best marriage is built on a respect for each other and more than a passing nod to your wedding vows.

Remember your wedding vows? While it can seem like a distant memory, it is important to remind yourself that you made a commitment to stay married to your spouse. For better or for worse is still very much a strong argument for getting - and staying - married.

People in fact like the "for better or for worse" aspect of marriage because it tells them that no matter what happens, no matter what marriage problem may arise, their husband or wife will be .

It goes beyond feeling like you have a security or safety net to prevent divorce. It's the knowledge that they can count on someone when times are bad, and that alone generates a considerable degree of peace of mind and a sense of calm for the soul.

And here's a romantic - but true - notion of marriage, to which happily married couples will agree: "Marriage moves us from ego to we-go".

The single self shifts from me first to the sacred union of us - values such as love, honesty, respect, fidelity and dependability form the heart of a good marriage. Little kindnesses keep the pump working. Without a pump, the heart would struggle and eventually stop working. With it, everything keeps running smoothly.

And how about the simplest reasons for marriage such as: silly little jokes, hugs and cuddling, traveling together, laughing together, quiet times together, mutual friends, sexual intimacy, pillow talk, kissing and making up? Can anyone really put a price tag on these simple pleasures? Don't they echo the saying that the best things in life are free?

*Read those in bolds or underlined.

I read it again & again. It's so true!

I really hope my little princess will keep me moving, i don't wish to stay put anymore. Staying put = unknown answer. I need an answer or a solution!

2 choices for me now:

Divorce & get a better man.

or

Salvage this marriage & build a better bondings.

We've serious communication breakdown. He doesn't understand what i'm talking about at all. When i talked to him face to face, he either don't reply or answer me rubbish which will upset me. So i used sms to tell him how i feel. But again, he will get the wrong idea of what i'm trying to imply. My english too chim or i'm speaking in a bangali language that he don't understand what i'm trying to say?

I hope ti-gong, dua pek gong, hong niang, ma zor or whatever god can come to my dreams tonight & offer me some good help or suggestions! If this man is not for me, then 长痛不如段痛. If this man is meant for me, HELP ME TO KNOCK SOME SENSE INTO HIM or CHANGE ME INTO SOMEONE THAT CAN SUITS HIS LIFESTYLE.

I seriously need to make a good choice now!

*3 fucking stupid mosquitos flying around my office the whole day, disturbing me. I managed to kill 2, still got 1 more. "You're not gonna get away, stupid mosquito"!

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