Thursday, March 8, 2012

What will my life be leh?

Saw the X-ray i did 5 years ago last night when my mum was flipping through my dad's X-rays. It's the X-ray required for me to study in Japan, the last step for the admission.

A few days after the X-ray, i discovered i was pregnant, with Raeann.

Can't help but felt a tinge of sadness. I wondered, what will my life be? If i selfishly aborted Raeann away and went ahead to pursue my dreams?

It was why i couldn't take it when my husband didn't treat me right after marriage, cos i feel i'll have a much better life ahead, if i didn't marry him.

But well, what to do? Time cannot be reversed. Keep thinking and whining about it also can't help in anything. Look forward & move on lor...

Saw a friend posted this on fb...

Can i say i 200% agree? I hope ZY reads this.

Always remember this : It's definitely not wrong to spoil your kids the way you want, but please be aware that not everyone can/must tolerate your kids the way you do.

But i better don't say so much lah, if not later people say i preach again, hahaha! As long as i know i don't spoilt my kids rotten can liao, what others want to do, it's none of my business yo! =)


  1. Hi Joanne,
    what were u planning to study in Japan? I was ssent away by my parent to overseas to study when I was 15, it was so hard, I miss home so much, to me I feel that my family abandon coz I feel that is not wat I really wan and they decide things for me even before I don even have any say. Have been more than 15 years, since I left my family and I somehow feel that I cant communicate with my family anymore. Everything I don wan to do, I am being force to do. Something I really wonder where is 'home'. I don feel a sense of belonging to anywhere.

    Maybe things will turn out well for you if u have study in Japan. Look at the bright side, you have two beautiful kids and supportive family. Sometime, learning to grow up quickly is not that bad after all.

    Envy the bond between your family and you.

    P.S: Sorry for my terrible English.

  2. Hey hi Annoymous,

    Your english is good, very simple and understandable. Mine is much worse. =X

    I was about to enter a Japan Uni cos my company has some connection/business with some Japan clients there. Was sent there to study as well as to work.

    I pleaded with my mum for a long time before she gave the green light, i was so happy cos i love Japan so much. They didn't abandon me in this case, i was the one who wanted to go.

    I'm in your situation right now -
    always being forced to do things i don't like. And i can't seem to have my own dream and goals. Becos everything i wanted to do, the tots of my kids stopped me from going further. But what i can do is, like what u said, look on the brighter side and i think i'm doing it well now.

    As for the bond with my family, i guess effort has to be put in for this. I wasn't this close to my mum when i was in Sec sch becos i seldom get to see her, she worked late every night.

    It was AFTER i became a mum, i stayed at home more, and i bonded with them more. =)

  3. Hi Joanne,
    Thanks for your compliment. Your English is good as well.

    I have been living on my own for for long, it is really hard for me to stay with my family again. I did try once but it is really hard because my family and I have different views on a lot things and at times, it cause us to argue. Anyway living on my own has taught me to grow up quickly and learn to make decision for myself.

    As for you, you have two beautiful and cute daughters. You have a loving family as well. You have found the one, maybe at time, things might not turn out the way it is. Maybe you don feel love anymore. At least you know that he did once made the effort to show his loving side to you b4. Is not my position to comment on your love life. I just envy you cause for me it is really had to find the one. 80% of me have given up on finding the one and marriage. I meet a lot of idiots in the past, and seen a lot of cheating in other ppl's marriage.

    Anyway sorry for the long long comment. Hope it won bored u to tear. Anyway you are beautiful, capable and smart. Stay the same as always. I believe that we only live once, we should do what we really wan.

  4. 家家有本难念的经. I believe each and everyone has their own problem, its a matter of how we ourselves look at it.

    I've already 看开 alot cos being happy is better than being sad everyday. Since 已经成了定居, no point for me to keep thinking about it.

    Keep your comment coming in, you can confide in me too (if u trust me), i'll be most willing to be your listening ears. Let's 加油 together okay! =D

  5. Thanks Joanne, is very sweet of you for offering a listening ear to me. I really appreciate it.

    Lets jia you together!

  6. Thanks Joanne, is very sweet of you for offering a listening ear to me. I really appreciate it.

    Lets jia you together!


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