Tuesday, February 24, 2015


Officially started work today; 初六! Becos hor, I'm pantang you know? They said Rat cannot be in office on 初五 as it will brings bad luck. Hahaha

Well, it's true, I'm not trying to escape anything, cos I prefer working life more. When I'm working, I'll have no time for nonsense, and I feel accomplished. 

Raeann has decided to come back, on her own accord. I did NOTHING to persuade her back. In fact, I asked her to go back to her dad's first becos there are a few things I need to arrange; her school bus & tuition.

Someone said, "she's old enough to think and decide what she wants", but why I get blamed again? So, am I supposed to push her away, when she's crying so badly that she wants to come back? 

If I do so, I'll be termed as "fucked up mom" again. See? This is what I mean by "everything I do is wrong". People can just say whatever they like, becos pushing blames is the easiest way out. 

And the best part? He took advantage of my mom's soft spot to attack me. However, it has already reached a stage till I'm starting to ignore my mom's requests. I mean, if it's reasonable, I will listen. If it's not, why should I? 

No idea why my mom even want to entertain him? She can just ignore, and let me handle it myself. Things won't be so complicated then. 

She knew I'm not in the wrong, but becos she wanted to have peace, so I'm expected to give in, always. To the extend when he physically abused me in front of them, I'm asked to forgive & forget and not to blow up the matter. And I've been asked to ignore all his verbal abuses for many many months. Ignorance is not a bliss, in this case. Cos he will get his own way, thinking that my mom supported him. Condoning is just as bad as participating. 

I can't help but keep wondering what's on her mind? I don't understand, at all. I think the only way to get everything solved is me moving out with the kids. 

1) She can get her desired peace.
2) I can handle things my own way, the way it should be. 

Becos I'll never look back again. I hope people can stop asking me, "do you need to resort to divorce?" Of cos I've valid reasons to do so, else why am I able to settle everything so fast?! 

Even the blind can see that I'm happier with my life now, even with my messy hair. 

The best way to make a woman feel loved, is to let her know that she's being appreciated.  

Everyday is their birthday, lolol. Oh, actually, tomorrow is everybody's birthday! 

This is mad funny! Hahahaha

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