Saturday, November 28, 2015

A day without stress!

Had a well spent Saturday with the kids, away from work, stress-less! The recent episode has caused a commotion in us. Confused, lost for words, anger, upset, and I don't know what else to describe. I hope things will settle down quickly and goes on smoothly from now on.

Kids; they are all born pure & innocent. No babies are born evil/cheats, isn't it? It's the upbringing and environment that made them what/how they are in the later phrase of their life. 

We, as parents, hold a great responsibility in what kind of adult they will turn out to be. But of cos, when they're already spoilt rotten, it's hard to discipline liao, and what you can do is to "hope" they will turn over a new leaf. Haiz... 

Personally, I don't pin any hope that my kids will "support" me in future. I mean, if they do, it's a bonus for me. But I do hope that they can be down to earth, honest and responsible for their own life. 

Whether they're able to find a good man, settle down and set up a family of their own, it's all fated. I'm really "open" on this, as long as the guy treats my girl good, even if he's poor, I'm okay. I don't look down on anyone, and I taught my kids not to look down on people too. 

Like I mentioned before - A rich man who is unwilling to spend his money/time on you VS A poor man who spends all his money and time on you, I'd prefer the latter. 

If he can shower you with expensive gifts & luxury lifestyle, but he's not around most of the time, he's probably in another woman's arm. I know I sound very bias here, but this is the reality. Marriage is too fragile nowadays, faithfulness is rare. Of cos, decent men still exist, just very rare. 

Anyway, as my girls grow up each day, it's easier to handle them when we are out now. Meimei can pee and clean herself, wash her hands etc. And Raeann do help out sometimes, when she's in good mood, lol. 

Becos I'm always out with them alone since babies, I can't help but to envy my own life now. I don't have to carry heavy bags, don't have to push a stroller, don't have to carry them, don't have to do a lot now. Most importantly, they listen. 

Like I brought them to market this morning, on the way walking home, they saw playground and asked if they can play awhile? I said "10 mins". But around 8 mins, Raeann called out "Mei, it's time to go home." And we walked home. I said Raeann can be really sensible and nice at times, right? (How nice if they don't have to attend schools, and we can lead kampong lifestyle everyday, haha!) 

And oh, the reason why we went market is, she said she wanna cook for me, ask me to bring her to buy ingredients.

We cooked these together! :)

And watched 'The Good Dinosaur' in the late noon! Guess what? Both girls sobbed. Hahaha 

The nonsense and anti-climate Meimei sobbed first. She was trying very hard to control her tears. It was shocking and funny lah. Impressed that she can understand the movie! When I knew she cried, I asked her why she cry? She denied and said "我留鼻涕", hahaha!
Still emo-ing after the movie, lol. Then before they sleep just now, they keep telling me about the movie! Meimei said she wants to watch again tomorrow. It's a nice cartoon, recommended, even B said it's nice. Imagine, cartoon leh. 

Raeann has been better lately, in terms of behaviour and attitude. Though I know she still secretly watched Minecraft, but she didn't ask for her iPad, neither gets jealous when Meimei can watch and she can't. She watched what Meimei was watching actually. They shared.

She did her tuition homework & took up a sudden interest in cooking. Well, she's not hopeless yet. She can still be disciplined properly, provided she stays (ONLY) within the family. Becos in order to do it, everyone must be very firm. 

I can't control anything if she goes to CCK. Cos I won't see/know what she's doing, I won't know anything. Hence, I'm going to be very firm on my stand from now onwards. She can still visit them of cos, but she cannot stay overnight. Under the custody's term, he has to bring her back before 12am. And if she refused to go, I'll not let her go. 

It's very sad that in order to please the adults, she has to do things against her own will. She already has a mind of her own, there's no point forcing her to do what she dislikes, it will only make her more rebellious and imbalanced. She has been asking "Why Meimei don't have to go, and why I have to go?" 

Meimei is never closed to them, so people will think it's "normal" if she refused to go. Raeann, on the contrary, didn't have a choice. 

So, in order to fill up this "hole", I've to do something about it. Planning to sign her up for classes on Sundays, learning something she likes, music or cooking. Need to search around & discuss it with her first. 

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